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Hi! My name is Emily and I'm a writer, a wife to Nick and mother to two very sweet little girls named Daisy and Ella. We live in a quaint little town outside Philadelphia, PA, with our two black lab sisters.

 

I started this blog as a way to stay connected with friends and family after Daisy was born and it has now become a home for musings on everything from our favorite family recipes, books, travel destinations and, ultimately, my quest to balance work, life, self-care and family - all while staying grateful. Happy reading!

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Advice for My Pregnant Best Friend

March 21, 2017

One of my best friends in the entire universe is pregnant for the first time and though it feels like she is at the other end of the earth (Natalie lives in San Francisco), her impending motherhood seems to have brought us closer together.

 

Now that I am a mom, I understand the eagerness with which my mom friends doled out their own pearls of wisdom after I announced I was pregnant. The experience of bringing a child into this world bonds us in a way that no other human experience can. I am epically thrilled to usher in a new member to this magnificent club of ours called motherhood. Natalie, your sunny personality sprinkles magic wherever you go and your free spirit will teach this boy of yours to taste life to the fullest and explore the ends of the earth without fear. I know you will be the most incredible mother and I cannot wait to watch your journey unfold.

 

Here are some little pearls of wisdom from me to you, Moonbeam.

  1. You don't need to prove yourself a hero during delivery. It’s okay to accept the epidural. No one will remember whether you did or didn’t. You are already a hero for carrying another human inside your body for nine months. And you will stay a hero for caring for that human for all the years that follow.

  2. Baby books are nice to have and fun to read while you’re waiting for baby to arrive, but, you will amaze yourself with how much comes naturally. Follow your instinct. You are connected to your child by heartstrings and your intuition when it comes to what they need will be stronger than anything you read on the internet or in a book.

  3. Don't let yourself get too caught up in daydreams of what early motherhood will look like. Setting expectations can be dangerous sometimes and the first days and weeks at home will likely not come close to those imaginings. They will be beautiful in different ways.

  4. Know your limits and be kind to yourself. Raise your hand when you need help and incorporate pieces of alone time and self-care into your schedule so you can take care of you. Book a massage, a hair appointment and a pedicure for the weeks after your baby is due - and promise yourself you won't break the appointments. This will get you out of the house in the earlier days and into the habit of self-care. A good blowout and fresh mani make me feel like I can take on the world.  

  5. Agree early on how you and Tyler will balance caring for your son. Nick is always on "night duty" because he has this unwavering ability to fall immediately back asleep after being woken up that I do not possess (and I am a heinous monster with any less than eight hours of sleep). He takes naps on the weekends and I make sure he isn't disturbed. Make sure you are each getting time to sleep, uninterrupted. Getting rest is just as important for you as it is for baby boy.

  6. You will need a Local Mama Tribe. If you don’t have one, get one now, before baby arrives. They’re everywhere on social media. They’ll know all the best doctors, parks, libraries, lactation consultants. My neighborhood has a Facebook group called the “Fishtown Mamas” and crazy as it sounds, they are a vital part of my broader tribe. I found my nanny, my book club, my house cleaner and Daisy’s pediatrician through them. I can post a quick "SOS! What is this rash?!" and within ten minutes, I have an answer and someone is coming over with a natural remedy. Your mama tribe will be more valuable than you can possibly anticipate now but just trust me, get one. 

  7. Breastfeeding may not be the purely sweet and sleepy picture we all romanticize. It might be arduous and frustrating and painful and you may have to give up eventually because it’s too hard. That’s okay. It doesn't make you weak. You haven't failed. 

  8. Yes, you really will need all those diapers. Every single one that is given to you. Sometimes babies poop WHILE you're changing their diaper so the clean one is already dirty. It's really astonishing what these tiny, sweet little bodies produce. Also, you can never have too many wipes. Never. You will never not need wipes for the rest of your life.

  9. Your body will bounce back. It will take a little time, but it will. Don't panic if you don't fit into your clothes right away. It might take six (or if you're me, ten) months. Whatever changes you see in your body, you're going to learn to love because they are the marks of bringing your son into the world. The scars and stretch marks are badges of honor and beautiful ones at that.

  10. You are going to be an absolutely incredible mother. I know you are nervous but that just means you’ll be an even better mom because you care so much about giving this little person the best life you can. Believe in yourself. Nothing (not even this advice) can fully prepare you for the journey you are about to embark on but I promise you it is the most magnificent, fulfilling and awe-inspiring adventure you'll ever take.

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